The Monthly Scribe

This is it everybody, the last month of the year, the final stretch of 2020. Do you recall the excitement in January? It was supposed kick off a fantastic new decade but that excitement sadly didn't last very long. What did last long though, is our undying perseverance to give you a great VPN service, our unquestionable determination to secure and anonymize every single one of your packets, and the strange jar of pickles left in the office fridge since March.
Just like the pickles, there is another thing that seems to last forever at Windscribe and it is the incoming spam messages we get in our inbox. Most of the spam is typical nonsense but every now and then, we are blessed with some truly great works. Sometimes it's thanks to Google translate, other times it's just pure gold from a spammer itself.
And so, in hopes of cheering you up this final month of 2020, we've sent a letter to Spamta Clause and asked him to grace you all with some of the finest interpretive poetry from our inbox. Enjoy these gifts from Spamta Clause himself. Kids look away as some of these messages might be a bit too naughty.

Lifetime Pro Giveaway

You wake up on Christmas morning, you run to the tree to start opening gifts and what do you see? That's right, an opportunity to win a Lifetime Pro code for Windscribe, just what you asked for! Spamta Clause was generous this year, Windscribe's Lifetime Pro plans are more rare than a VPN reviewer not basing their scores on the affiliate money they will earn.
If you'd like to enter the giveaway for this highly sought-after prize, all you gotta do is leave a comment in this thread telling us what you like about Windscribe and how it has helped you. We've heard some incredible stories from people who have sent in feedback and we realized that we enjoy having our ego boosted. Passing 28 million users a few days ago gives us much joy, but hearing from some of the individual people, that's when the tears start flowing.
So tell us why you like Windscribe, why it's so great and why you are ready to spend the rest of your LIFE using our service. Come January 1st, we will select a random commenter, make sure their answer has tickled our ego enough and give them a Lifetime Pro code. Good luck everyone!
As for the contest last month where we asked you all to come up with acronyms for R.O.B.E.R.T, we got some creative ideas but our favorite one came from photo-smart who suggested: Robotic Octagon Battling Every Rotten Technology and even added a bonus idea: Really Ought to Be Everyone's Regular Technology. We wholeheartedly agree with that last one. Congrats to you photo-smart, you will get the 1 Year Pro code in your inbox shortly.

Windscribe Updates

Mobile Apps
An update on the mobile side of of things includes a new way to pay for Windscribe! Before this, you'd only have the option for one month or one year payments in the iOS and Android apps, but we want more of your money and so you can now subscribe to the Pro plans in the mobile apps and leave it. We actually prefer you leave it subscribed because then we can buy more cool things for the office like a taxidermied platypus. Yes we need one, it's vital to our office morale and we will call him Steve the Secure Platypus.
Microsoft Edge Browser Add-on
A while back, Microsoft vastly changed how the Edge browser works, they gave up and converted to using Chromium as the base browser. That's great news because now we can take our Chrome browser extension and use it in Edge! Less work for us, more client support for you. If you're one of the people who is using the new Edge browser, feel free to download and try out our Edge add-on from here. Please bear in mind that we have not yet had time to do a deep dive for the Edge-specific add-on and so you'll see a few Chrome icons here and there until we fix those.
Mac Desktop App
We've received a number of emails regarding the Mac version of our desktop application and how it will be affected by the new Big Sur update. If you have not heard yet, Apple has decided to slap all privacy advocates across the face by implementing some changes to the latest version of Mac OS which affect how internet traffic is firewalled. There is a link in the Boredom Bits section below that describes these issues in more depth.
The new update does in fact affect Windscribe but not the actual VPN Firewall in the app. There are 2 ways that traffic can be filtered on Mac OS. The first one is with an application firewall and the second is with a packet firewall. The application firewall is what has been changed in the new OS, Apple no longer gives full access to how this firewall can be used and forces some applications through regardless of what settings you have. On the other hand, the packet filter works based on the IPs and packet data of your internet traffic and this is what Windscribe uses for its firewall. This functionality has not changed in Big Sur and so there is no concern about the Windscribe VPN tunnel leaking any data.
Where the effects of the new changes come into play are with the new 2.0 app which some of you are already using in its beta form. The new 2.0 app has the Split Tunneling feature which allows you to select which apps go through the tunnel and which ones don't. This feature uses the application firewall built into the system, the one that has been altered by Apple. As this is how the new OS will function, we can no longer offer the Split Tunneling feature in its ideal version, it will be a best-effort from us and might not work correctly for the applications you have.

Boredom Bits - News Edition

This month, we've decided to forgo sending you hilarious or intriguing videos and opted to post some more important news related to privacy instead. But you still get the funny cat pictures, don't worry.
First off is the update to Big Sur. As mentioned in the section above, there are some worrying privacy changes Apple implemented using their new M1 chips and architecture. Jefferey Paul has written a great analysis on all the issues with these new changes: https://sneak.berlin/20201112/your-computer-isnt-yours/. Additionally, you can check out this twitter thread for some demonstrations of the flaws in the new system.
On a Windscribe-related note, the Microsoft Edge add-on we just published a few days ago has had a bit of controversy as well. Some naughty people (who will get coal in their stocking) decided to publish over a dozen fake and malicious VPN add-ons under the guise of legitimate VPNs. Windscribe was one of these add-ons and Microsoft finally took down the fake version from the Add-on store a few days ago. If you installed Windscribe for Edge before December, please remove it from your system and use this version instead which is the official release from us. If you want to read more about these events, TechRadar has an article about it.
Finally, a quick note about an announcement from Microsoft regarding a new security chip they call Pluton. Microsoft is working with AMD and Intel on this new chip which will be integrated into the hardware of your computer. Some concerns have been raised regarding the privacy aspects of this as it requires connectivity to Microsoft's cloud servers to update, opening a potential hardware backdoor. Wired has a great article diving into this new chip.
And the most important news is this album of funny cats, enjoy!
Thanks for joining us on this subreddit, we love our community and read much of your feedback. Tell your friends to join, we'll do something special at 20k subscribers! While you're at it, tell them to follow our Twitter for more real-time updates and the ever-growing Discord server too. Happy Holidays everybody!

[Starting] 21(ish) in 21 (plus a brief review of 2020)

Hey all! I recently discovered this sub thanks to u/ofdiminishingreturns. I love making lists and I'm terrible at finishing games, so it's basically a match made in heaven! I've tried various approaches in the past year to whittle down my backlog, with varying degrees of success. The most successful approach so far was to sort my Steam library by time to beat according to HowLongToBeat.com, and then pick the shortest games to play through and complete. Thanks to that, I finished 25 games from Sep-Dec 2020! (Out of the total 31 that I finished in the whole year.) The drawback of this approach is that I feel like I need to finish all my small games before I can tackle any bigger ones, so I'm hoping making a short goal list for 2021 with some games I really want to play, regardless of their length, will help me.
Looking at my list in theory, with the whole year ahead of me, it seems pretty underambitious - but realistically, I'd probably be lucky to finish at least half of these. I'm notoriously bad at finishing games, I get sidetracked easily due to all the other stuff waiting to be played (and also because life), and I'll probably still play other games that aren't on my list when the mood strikes me. And I surely won't be able to resist buying new games along the way that might oust others from the list. AND I'm moving to another country for work this year, so for all I know I won't be able to play any games at all. But hey, it's a starting point, right?! :-)
I roughly followed the genre themes listed for each month, just as a way of narrowing down my choices and keeping some variety in my game list. I may scramble these around to different months depending on what I feel like playing when, but if I finish at least half of these by the end of the year, I'll call it a job well done.

	Genre	List A	List B	Est. TTB (A)	Est. TTB (B)	Hrs/Month
January	~~Shooters~~ Misc	Finish Alba: A Wildlife Adventure	Finish In Other Waters	10	10	20
February	Puzzle/ Platformer	Songbird Symphony !	--	8	--	8
March	Strategy	Rise of the Slime	Wintermoor Tactics Club	10	20	30
April	RPGs	Finish Cat Quest	CrossCode	7	50	57
May	Action	Slasher's Keep	--	40	--	40
June	Adventure	Paradise Killer	Frog Detective 2, Tangle Tower ✓	20	10	30
July	Sandbox / Builder	RimWorld	Founder's Fortune	20	20	40
August	Simulation	Monster Loves You!	Deep Sixed	8	6	14
September	Metroidvania	Monster Sanctuary	--	40	--	40
October	~~Horror~~ "Horror"	Tales of the Black Forest	Hotel Sowls	8	5	13
November	~~Fighter~~ itch.io Bundle Games	Jimmy & The Pulsating Mass	Golem Creation Kit, Clam Man	45	10	55
December	Anything Goes / Year In Review	Mutazione	OneShot / complete unfinished	14	10	24+
				Total TTB	371	hours
				Total TTB	15	days
				Avg/Month	31	hours

Comments:
January - I don't really play shooters, so for January I'm just gonna do a "miscellaneous month" and finish up the games I had started before Christmas when I dropped everything to play Animal Crossing.
March - I've picked a card-based strategy game I bought in the Winter sale plus a casual tactics game - that counts, right? From what I can tell of Rise of the Slime, it has essentially zero story, while Wintermoor is like a tactics/VN hybrid, so I think they'll balance each other nicely.
April - I started Cat Quest back in like Aug 2019 and it's been waiting to be finished. I also started CrossCode on Xbox Game Pass for PC some time ago, got about 25 hours in, was like "I like this game so much I want it on Steam," and haven't gone back to it since. A little ambitious for me, time-wise, but I'd love to finish it this year (and I'll most likely start fresh).
June - seems like 80% of the games in my library classify as "adventure," so I picked a few I'm itching to play that just so happen to also all fit into the subgenre of "mystery/investigation" - I've found myself enjoying these types of games a lot recently. Also, Frog Detective takes like 2 hours to finish, tops, so I'm tacking Tangle Tower on there as well.
July - let's be honest, "finishing" RimWorld is not something I can even hope to accomplish in my lifetime, so I'll just aim to play it for ~20 hours and hopefully get the hang of it / have some fun along the way; same for Founder's Fortune. I'll try to play at least one of these two, if not both.
August - Simulation seems pretty open-ended to me and these games are tagged as such on Steam, so...! I think some small games will be good after the bigger time commitment of July.
October - I'm a scaredy cat and don't play Horror(TM) games, so I picked a couple from the spooky/creepy category in my Steam library.
November - I also don't play fighters, so I'm gonna take this month as an opportunity to pick out a few games from that huge Racial Justice bundle itch.io hosted over the summer (which I haven't even touched yet, naturally). I just chose the first few games I came across that made me go "yeah, that one." Maybe this will also help keep me from buying games on Steam that I already have from this bundle.
I've taken estimates for the time it will take to complete each game ("time to beat," or TTB) from HowLongToBeat.com, and in most cases added an hour or two because I play slow af. For games not on the site, I just made my best guess. Or in the case of games like RimWorld that I will never ever finish, just the number of hours I'd like to put into it that month.
Of course, this list pretty much completely ignores anything outside of my Steam library (GOG, Epic, Xbox Game Pass, Twitch Prime, etc), just because I still find my Steam library the easiest tool for cataloging game info - despite the fact that I've tried GOG Galaxy *and* Playnite, I've had issues with both of them. I also was gifted a Switch Lite for Christmas and this does not account for any of the games I'd like to play on that. I'll definitely be keeping up with my daily tasks in Animal Crossing and playing other games on it now and then - luckily, almost all the Switch games I've bought so far (aside from AC) can be finished in ~1-10 hours.

2021 Progress:
So far haven't actually started on anything from my list, lol - I've been trying out some of the games I bought in the Winter sales to make I don't want to refund anything. I checked out Journey to the Savage Planet, Yaga, and Cardpocalypse on Epic (all fun games!). I've started a couple small games I got in the Steam sale (Golf Peaks, Pepper's Puzzles). I've been playing a bit of Animal Crossing each day on my Switch and also started playing Gorogoa and a couple other small puzzle games (Inbento, Locomotion) on there. And I finished a Switch game called A Hero and A Garden (a brief visual novel/clicker game). Hopefully this week I can finish Alba, and maybe I'll start Songbird Symphony early, 'cause I feel like it!

2020 Year in Review:
I also made up a list of the games I completed this year and the games I played but didn't finish. The list got pretty long, so I'll just link to a Google Sheet summarizing everything to keep my post from being too ridiculous. I'm gonna try to give some brief reviews of the games I did finish in 2020 below (I am really bad at being concise, sorry for the novel here!)
Selected Game Reviews from 2020 -

The Haunted Island, A Frog Detective Game: hilarious adventure game about playing as the famous Frog Detective and solving the case of a ghost haunting the Sloth King's island. Super memorable despite being very short. The humor of the dialog is on point and the characters are adorable (or creepily distorted, depending on how you see it - my boyfriend saw me playing this and asked "are you playing a horror game?!" lmao)
Samsara Room: free "escape room" point-and-click type game from the makers of the Cube Escape/Rusty Lake series. Short but great, really enjoyed the clever puzzles and semi-spooky aesthetic, and led me to complete my collection of this dev's games on Steam (I had a couple already but this is the first one I've actually played). Has quite a devoted following.
Rymdkapsel: minimalist tower-defense/strategy game in which you build out a space station to reach and research mysterious monoliths while defending yourself from increasingly challenging waves of enemies. Has a couple different games modes and challenges (e.g., research all monoliths in less than 45 min, etc).
Monster Garden: little adventure in which you play a monster who invites other monsters to be his friend and come live in his garden. Game events change depending on who you decide to "recruit" to be your friend. Slight platforming interspersed mostly with talking to various monsters and making choices. Room for replayability if you want all monster friend achievements. Has that "Undertale vibe."
Glass Masquerade: chill puzzle game about assembling stained glass clocks with motifs representing different countries around the world. Beautiful and relaxing and not that difficult - I bought the sequel and all DLC in the latest Steam sale. I've heard the sequel is a bit harder.
The Crown of Leaves: extremely interesting visual novel/point-and-click hybrid adventure game that seems to be based heavily on Eastern European/Romani(?) mythology (for example, the characters live in caravans called vardos). The English localization leaves something to be desired, but somehow I think it works here to make the game more authentic, or at least it didn't bother me that much. The art is really beautiful and has stuck with me even after finishing the game!
Detective Grimoire: point-and-click investigative adventure with the famous Detective Grimoire. (I say "famous" because he's been in two other games - a prequel flash game and a sequel called Tangle Tower.) I really enjoyed this one - it's fully voice-acted (and done well), with a kooky art style and a fun investigation mechanic. I had it narrowed down to two suspects at the end, and my final guess was right! So basically I'm a genius detective now. This goes on sale for SUPER cheap, I highly recommend it.
Evan's Remains: puzzle platformer with kind of a weird sci-fi story that kept me hooked through to the end, but afterwards I found myself half wanting to know more about the lore of this world and half thinking about all the plot holes. Really beautiful pixel art, and even though the story kind of fell flat in the end, the puzzles were quite fun. I binged it all in a day and can recommend it on sale, at least (it's not expensive to begin with).
Four Last Things: point-and-click adventure composed entirely of images from Renaissance art, which makes for a pretty hilarious game. I got totally stuck in some parts and had to use a guide, after which I felt pretty stupid for not figuring the stuff out on my own. Very tongue-in-cheek humor; has a sequel called The Procession to Calvary.
Little Misfortune: an "interactive story" in the words of the devs, who also made Fran Bow. It seems a lot of hardcore Fran Bow fans were not happy with Little Misfortune, but I loved it! It was just the right mix of cute, funny, irreverent, and creepy. It also deals with some heavy subject matter and made me tear up a bit at the end. The voice acting is really funny and the art is great. I'd like to replay it sometime to see what effects the different choices have and to get the rest of the achievements.
Mandagon: free, brief platformer about restoring a temple in a mysterious world inspired by Tibetan mythology. Beautiful pixel art, relaxing gamplay - and did I mention it's free?! My eyes bugged out when I saw people on the Steam page complaining "there's no gameplay" and "pity I can't refund my time"... bruh. It's free. A beautiful one-hour experience that makes for a relaxing evening.
Robot Island: "visual novella" - you're a service robot on a passenger spaceship that's been repurposed to transport cargo, and you have to help the captain of the ship get through his lonely journey. There are several dialog choices, so I'm guessing there's some replayability, although I assume the ending is always the same. Does a good job of endearing the characters to you in a short amount of time. The robot has funny comments to say about pretty much everything on the ship.
Tengami: short puzzle adventure in a paper pop-up book art style; you travel around solving puzzles to find flowers and restore your cherry blossom tree. By the same devs as Astrologaster. It's very pretty, but movement is slow and some of the puzzles are a little obtuse.
A Short Hike: what can I say that hasn't already been said? This game is amazing, chill, adorable, fun, relaxing, and simply delightful. Using a controller to fly around feels really nice. I finished the story of the game, but could go back to get the last few achievements, which mostly involve beating some small mini-games. This has been bundled numerous times, given away for free, and is cheap as it is - go play it!!

BONUS LIST!!
Not that I should be looking at any new games coming out this year 'cause they'll just distract me from my goals, but! I love checking out upcoming indie titles and I have a TON on my Steam wishlist that I'm keeping tabs on. I'm including a brief list of some of my most anticipated releases for this year (hopefully they won't get delayed!). I'm recommending most of these on the basis of enjoying their demos, with a few included just based on the art or gameplay looking cool:

She Dreams Elsewhere (demo available)
Chicory: A Colorful Tale
Garden Story
NUTS
Lemon Cake
Cris Tales (release was delayed from Nov 2020, hopefully it will come out on time now! Demo available.)
Minute of Islands (don't know much about it yet, but the art looks gorgeous)
Sizeable (demo available)
Boy Beats World (demo available)
Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion
Eastward
Ashina: The Red Witch (demo and prologue available)
Alchemic Cutie
Ynglet
Say No! More
Mutropolis (demo and free mini-game available on itch.io)
8-Bit Adventures 2 (demo available)
Mayhem in Single Valley (demo available)
Olija (demo available)
One Lonely Outpost

Happy gaming in 2021, y'all!!

Animal Crossing Camp v3.4.0 Update

An overly long rundown of all the times I went to the cinema in 2020.

So, it’s the end of the year, and whilst it hasn’t been a good one for attending the movies, I still have managed to get there 56 times between various lockdowns.
I thought it’d be neat to have a look back at all the films I saw in the cinema in 2020 and just discuss my thoughts.
Some points of clarification beforehand though: I am based in the UK (mostly NI), so the films here were watched mostly according to UK release schedules and GB/NI lockdowns (hence why I’m posting this before the year is even up, cinemas won’t be reopening here after Christmas for at least 4 weeks). I will also be using the proper date formatting of DD/MM so fight me.
I've spoilered whatever I felt like needed spoilering. There's some stuff spoilered that probably didn't need spoilering, but hey ho.
I am also a straight, white, cis guy in the 18-25 age bracket, so please take my opinions in accordance with those shitty facts.
I ended 2019 with Cats, and it's a shame I can't talk about it on this list, but I just want you all to know that I watched Cats in the cinema and that it was my last movie of last year.
Let’s get on with it then.
1) Little Women (dir. Greta Gerwig) – 08/01
The year started with a bang with Greta Gerwig’s wonderful adaptation of Louisa May Alcott’s Classic Novel… something I had no prior experience with, so the story was entirely new to me. As such I went through the film in this first watch through and it wasn’t until after Beth dies that I got all emotional and that. Mr Laurence and Jo talking outside the house was what brought me to the brink of tears on this watch through. I really love it.
2) Jojo Rabbit (dir. Taika Waititi) – 12/01
A more controversial film here, but one that I also adore. Personally, Waititi manages to balance the comic and tragic really well, and the characters are all wonderful. And boy, does Rosie dying really take the wind out of you on that first watch through. The great visual storytelling throughout the film really makes that moment what it is.
3) 1917 (dir. Sam Mendes) – 12/01
1917 is just a great film, and I’m kinda pissed at myself that I didn’t go back and watch it again in the cinema. The one-take format, Roger Deakins’ cinematography, the score, it’s all so immersive and pulls you into this world. Speaking of Deakins, the ‘moving shadows’ sequence, as I tend to call it, is crazy fantastic. The central performance by George MacKay is worryingly underappreciated, the style of this film may be the reason it got made and raised its cultural awareness, but he carried it, this is almost a single hander and he does a great job.
4) Uncut Gems (dir. Josh & Benny Safdie) – 15/01
Adam Sandler gives his performance a manic energy, that really should’ve been nominated outside of the independents. The film just ramps up the anxiety constantly and it rarely lets up. Just an incredible piece of work, very happy I saw this in the cinema rather than at home so that my full attention was paid.
5) Your Name. (dir. Makoto Shinkai) – 15/01
A truly fantastic film from front to back. My first time watching was at my friends house on a not great TV via a less than licit website. And still, watching that third act unfold was one of the most stressful and emotionally engaging movie-watching experiences that I’ve had. I’m so happy I went and watched it on the big screen, it’s just such a beautiful experience that still packs a punch, even on the umpteenth watch.
6) Weathering With You (dir. Makato Shinkai) – 15/01
Whilst I don’t think it reaches the heights of Your Name, I still think this film is a wonder to watch. It takes the near-photorealistic stylings of Your Name and ups the ante in quite a few places. There’s a sequence involving fireworks that comes to mind. I need to buy the Steelbook (which includes RADWIMPS wonderful soundtrack) so I can rewatch this, because it deserves it.
7) Jojo Rabbit (dir. Taika Waititi) – 16/01 (Round Two)
The second watch through of this made me appreciate the visual storytelling going on all the more, and despite me anticipating the moment, it didn’t lessen the punchiness of it. It’s just a really lovely, but bittersweet film and I love it.
8) Bombshell (dir. Jay Roach) – 17/01
I found this to be an effective film, if not perhaps the best way this story could have been told. Personally I would’ve liked to have seen the Murdoch’s been more reviled within the text of the film, and perhaps women writing/directing would’ve been a better choice all around. However, despite all this, the performances are all solid as hell, as are the make-up and prosthetics used to transform these actors. The big assault scene is also very effective and chilling, which is probably mostly down to Margot Robbie’s performance in that specific moment.
9) The Personal History of David Copperfield (dir. Armando Iannucci) – 24/01
I really like this film, as I love pretty much everything else Iannucci does. The casting, done purely off who felt right for the role as opposed to who looked right (racially speaking) is genuinely phenomenal, this cast is packed and all doing fine work. The film’s style and wit is very well placed and I’m always happy to rewatch it.
10) Little Woman (dir. Greta Gerwig) – 25/01 (Round Two)
On this second viewing, pretty much every scene with Beth in it made me emotional, doubly so if they were with Mr Laurence. After the first watch through, the second time you see Beth play the piano at Laurence’s house, which is admittedly an already emotionally charged scene, just becomes something even more beautiful entirely. I truly love everything this film does.
11) Just Mercy (dir. Destin Daniel Cretton) – 29/01
A really compelling drama that’s excellently played and handled with enough traumatic scenes (pretty much just the one) that it touches that lil drama nerve, but not so much that it overwhelms the film. The film is very effective and went under-appreciated when it released. I hope that with the release of Shang-Chi people go back and watch more of Cretton’s filmography and find this (as well as Short Term 12) because it’s a gem.
12) A Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood (dir. Marielle Heller) – 31/01
Casting one of the nicest people in entertainment as maybe the nicest person in entertainment certainly does the job. I do need to add the caveat that, being from the UK, Mr Rogers isn’t really a name over here, and I certainly don’t know that much about him or his programming. However, Tom Hanks does a damn good job, and does more than just the ‘nice man is nice’ that you might expect. Plus Heller has the confidence to have a scene with over a minute’s worth of pure silence where Tom Hanks stares down the barrel, and it’s incredibly effective, massive congratulations to her there.
13) The Lighthouse (dir. Robert Eggers) – 31/01
“Nothing good happens when two men are trapped in a giant phallus” certainly rings true. The Lighthouse has so many great assets, the core double act of Dafoe and Pattinson, the tight as hell aspect ratio that makes everything feel claustrophobic, the black and white grime, the constant sound, be it sea noise, alarm blare, or cacophonous soundtrack. I’m very happy that I caught this in the cinema, because whilst I will undoubtably return to this at home at some point, it just will never be quite the same.
14) Dolittle (dir. Stephen Gaghan) – 01/02
It’s shit, I don’t need to go much further. Downey Jr’s bizzarro choice to do a Welsh accent he most certainly cannot do is one of the biggest standouts (especially when full blown Welshman Michael Sheen is also in the cast (and is also the film’s redeeming spot)). The CG and how the cinematography refuses to use it to good effect really hurt it. However, the best way I can think of to show you how bad this film is is that one of the major moments in the climax of the film revolves around Downey Jr removing sets of armour and bagpipes from a dragon’s arse using a leek as an enema. End of review.
15) Richard Jewell (dir. Clint Eastwood) – 05/02
Paul Walter Hauser shines in this film, he’s really good at playing this character who only wants to help to his own detriment. I liked this film, although I fear I don’t have that much to say on the subject. My main gripe is probably how Olivia Wilde’s character is portrayed, less by her and more by the script and framing, it’s just a bit sexist and not great. The rest of the film is pretty good though.
16) Once Upon a Time… In Hollywood (dir. Quentin Tarantino) – 05/02
I didn’t get around to seeing this in its first run, so was happy I saw it for the first time in the cinema for a bring back screening before the Oscars (my first time watching live, and boy what a time before everything went to hell, but that’s another thing). I like so much of this film, and I think the scenes are great in isolation a lot of the time (Pitt going to the Manson Ranch is incredibly effective to name one scene in particular), however the film as a whole just needs restraint. It does not need to be 2 hours and 40 minutes long, and we certainly don’t need half of an episode of a pulp western show in there, it’s a nice bonus feature for the blu-ray, but I don’t need it in the movie personally. On the whole I really enjoyed it, but I would’ve preferred to see just a little bit shaved off.
17) Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (dir. Cathy Yan) – 07/02
The movie that would quickly become my favourite modern DC film (MoS and beyond), which is not a difficult hurdle to jump, I will admit, however it is a fact (of opinion). It also became a go to rewatch for me for a period over lockdown. I love so much of what this film does, from centring the film on Harley forging her own path, to the batshit greed and self-entitlement of Roman Sionis the characters are all *chef’s kiss*. The fight scenes really allow each individual character to shine and have their own distinct styles, and they manage to pull of the feat of not making Harley Quinn just hitting stuff with a bat be boring. The soundtrack, both the album and score, are top notch, as is the pop punk styling of the film as a whole. The controversial costumes are great and I will fight you on that. Also Mary Elizabeth Winstead as an awkward crossbow wielding badass is yet another *chef’s kiss*. Also also, McGregor’s delivery of “These are my things, this diamond is my things! My things! Fucking fuck!” is to die for.
18) Parasite (dir. Bong Joon-Ho) – 08/02
Boy howdy do I need to give this one a rewatch, I have it on Blu-Ray, I just haven’t got around to it yet for whatever reason. I won’t say too much about it because the best way to go into this film is completely blind; but suffice to say that it is a masterpiece, and its Oscar win was well deserved (and had me screaming at something like 4am in the morning… sorry flatmates). If you haven’t watched it… do, the fuck is wrong with you?
19) Queen & Slim (dir. Melina Matsoukas) – 12/02
This didn’t get the attention it deserved I don’t think. A compelling Bonnie and Clyde story for the modern age that only got more and more prescient as the year went by. The performances are all very solid, and the direction is as well. This also features maybe my favourite sex scene of all time? It’s very effectively done and really lends itself to the drama (it was also a well written sequence, which I only know because I went and checked the screenplay after I was still thinking about it a couple of months later). I would really recommend it.
20) Sonic the Hedgehog (dir. Jeff Fowler) – 14/02
It’s fine? I’ve seen much better, I’ve seen much worse. It’s better than the trailer, but that’s not saying much (and also doesn’t mean it’s a really good film). It certainly didn’t help that right behind me in the screening were some memey edgelord 13 year olds who loved doing things like reciting ‘Ummm… meow’ when it happened, not a rowdy screening guys (and being an awkward British soul, I certainly didn’t stop them). Ben Schwartz is lovely as he always tends to be, and Jim Carrey really owns his role as Robotnik, but as a whole the movie isn’t anything more than serviceable for me. If I’m going to go for a family film based on a video game series it’s going to end up being Detective Pikachu, which I feel just has a better overall stylistic edge, as well as the worldbuilding being tighter.
21) Emma. (dir. Autumn de Wilde) – 15/02
This is a wonderful adaptation that, much like every other classic book adaptation on here, I had no prior experience with. Anya Taylor-Joy is excellent in the role as Emma, but maybe the standout, surprisingly, is Miranda Hart as Miss Bates, who creates the perfect mix between the bumbling fool of the film and its central heart. The big climactic emotional moment of the film got a gasp out of my screening which, as a British cinema experience, isn’t usual. De Wilde’s direction is wonderful, Waller-Bridge and Schweitzer’s music is lovely, and the pastel art design is perfection. Very much recommend.
22) Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (dir. Cathy Yan) – 16/02 (Round Two)
My reaction on second watch was much the same as the first watch, my opinions properly cementing themselves and BoP placing itself squarely as my favourite DCEU film (again, not the biggest hurdle, Shazam! was my number #2 at the time). As I don’t really have much more to say that I haven’t already said in the first screening, I shall move on.
23) The Call of the Wild (dir. Chris Sanders) – 20/02
As far as I know, this book isn’t a staple of British schooling in anywhere close to the same way that it is in the US. Therefore, my knowledge of this source material is… well nothing. I did, surprisingly, quite enjoy this film. I found myself caring for this expressive as hell CG dog and I found the sledding sequences genuinely quite breathtaking in places. I’ve certainly seen better films, but I’ve seen far worse as well. Harrison Ford is also, shockingly, decent and fun in this film, and certainly not as gruff and not into it as you may expect. It’s not as bad as you might think.
24) Little Joe (dir. Jessica Hausner) – 24/02
I want more plant horror please. Hausner directs this film in the most unsettling way possible, camera moves continue for far too long, the acting stilted (which begs the question of how influenced people are by the titular plant), the music absurd – filled with barking and strange atonalities you don’t expect. It’s not a movie for everyone, but it was one that gelled with me. I would recommend it, and boy do I want to see a new Day of the Triffids adaptation.
25) Portrait of a Lady on Fire (dir. Céline Sciamma) – 28/02
I love this beautiful, quiet ass film. It’s just a slow build up of romantic tension (the central characters don’t even kiss until the 1 hour 20 minute mark), until the final lovely release for the last third. The cinematography is beautiful and crisp, the few points where music does come into the picture are glorious. The point at which a man appears after nearly two hours of not is genuinely disorienting, and the final shot and scene is something I go back and regularly rewatch because it’s such a gorgeous feat of direction and acting.
26) Onward (dir. Dan Scanlon) – 29/02
Whilst very mid-tier Pixar, Onward isn’t without a lot of merit. It’s a gorgeous film for one, 3D animation is getting hella good, the big emotional beat in the last act somehow manages to work incredibly well despite the rest of the film being so so emotions wise. The humour is in the right place for most of it, as is the characterisation. I was expecting Chris Pratt’s character to be full on jock from the trailers and his design but it was pleasant to discover that he’s just a big ol’ D&D nerd within this fantasy world. I think Soul, despite not having seen it yet, is going to end up being the standout Pixar film of the year and Onward will be somewhat forgotten, but I don’t think it should be necessarily, because it is a good time.
27) Military Wives (dir. Peter Cattaneo) – 02/03
I was pleasantly surprised by this film. I was honestly expecting something a bit more propaganda/patriotismy, and it wasn’t, which I was happy about. The performances are all solid (as you should probably expect from actors like Kristin Scott Thomas and Sharon Horgan), and the film as a whole is perfectly heartwarming, as well as having the moments of heartbreak you expect from a film like this. The barracks life is not something I’m at all used to, so I was happy to be exposed to a new way of life for some people that I don’t know, always nice to have.
28) The Invisible Man (dir. Leigh Whannell) – 03/03
A truly great modern adaptation of The Invisible Man, with an ingenious abuse/gaslighting slant that really works for this film and this concept. Elizabeth Moss is fantastic as this traumatised character, who you understand completely from the start, which is a practically wordless scene of her escape. The direction is brilliantly creepy, the way the camera will pan or linger on seemingly nothing to let you know that something may be there is incredibly effective. I’m only just starting getting into horror as a genre and I’m happy to have this as one of my big early introductions.
29) Calm with Horses (dir. Nick Rowland) – 09/03
This was a mystery screening kinda thing so I had no idea what I was going into when it started. What I found was a decently compelling Irish drama with some great performances. What I also didn’t expect was a surprise car chase midway through the film, and boy am I a sucker for car chases in shitty cars, and it delivers. Much like Uncut Gems, it’s a film where the situation just gets worse and worse for everyone involved, with only brief hopes for salvation along the way. I haven’t rewatched it since, nor am I especially planning on doing so, but I remember it being a pretty dang good time and I would recommend it.
30) Hidden Figures (dir. Theodore Melfi) – 10/03
I’m honestly frustrated by the fact that this film works so well for me. It’s one of those movies about black women made by white men where racism is kinda magically solved. However, the performances are damn strong, the music is lovely and its storytelling is strong. I think the focus on three characters who all end up doing different things in NASA is a good choice and allows it to feel varied and in general give us a bigger picture of the agency at the time, and I like that about it.
31) The Hunt (dir. Craig Zobel) – 11/03
For a movie so overtly political this really has nothing to say. It’s so frustratingly centrist in a ‘what if both sides are actually the bad guys’ that you just don’t care. This is a ‘Most Dangerous Game’ story, I don’t want to not like both sides. Betty Gilpin is great and does carry the film to a great degree, and I did like the opening and the constant shifting of seeming protagonists, that’s fun. However, it’s still such a deeply frustrating, and honestly just straight up bad a lot of the time, that I wouldn’t recommend it, indeed, for a film touting itself as the ‘most controversial film of the year’, it really just didn’t do anything. If you’re jonesing for a modern ‘Dangerous Game’ story, just watch Ready or Not instead.
32) My Spy (dir. Peter Segal) – 14/03
My last film before lockdown… I probably should’ve chosen better. However, I will say that it isn’t all that bad. It’s a perfectly serviceable kids spy movie with some engaging performances (Kristen Schaal (who is always a joy) and the central child’s performance) and enough decent gags to not make you hate it. I had a far better time than I expected, but it’s not something I’m telling you to rush out and see.
OH NO LOCKDOWN ONE HIT
33) Tenet (dir. Christopher Nolan) – 10/09
Oh dear, the film that was meant to ‘save cinema’… poorly timed, and not as crowd pleasing as something like Inception. For a movie so dense and heavy in its premise, you really need an emotional centre to ground you, and Tenet really didn’t deliver that for me. John David Washington really tries to wring out something from Nolan’s cold empty writing but there’s just nothing there for me. The much-maligned sound is rightly maligned, I must’ve missed important plotty lines of dialogue and was lost for the next fifteen minutes until the next plotpoint happened, and this wasn’t a one off. I would also like to point out the colour grading, because it really shows that this is Nolan’s first with a black protagonist. The shadows are so crushed that Washington just gets lost in the background consistently, and it’s just not great to look at. I’ve seen this twice so will get to stuff I liked more in that second screening because I’ve spent too long on this first as is.
34) The New Mutants (dir. Josh Boone) – 14/09
Better than expected I think, especially for a film that’s been stuck in release hell for so long. However, that doesn’t mean it’s anything great. I really think that, had they had the time to have the reshoots they wanted to do, it could have really been improved. I do like the representation in the film, I like seeing a native-american protagonist, and it’s nice to see that same protagonist be allowed to actually be gay, something that every other cinematic universe just isn’t doing. I will say, however, that I’m not convinced by the accents that everyone has been made to do, although I am known to be fairly accent-deaf so don’t count me as a good source on that.
35) Jurassic Park (dir. Steven Spielberg) – 14/09
I mean… it’s Jurassic Park, I don’t really need to say much more. What I will say is that, being a gosh dang young-un, I’ve not been able to see JP in a cinema, and doing so is just a magical experience, the opening thumps and the T-Rex’s roar are wonderful to listen to and experience in a cinema setting. It’s real good. It’s also the start of the big bring backs, because cinemas ran out of new things to show.
36) Star Wars – Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back (dir. Irvin Kershner) – 15/09
I don’t need to say anything here either and saying too much about any Star Wars is going to end up in trauma some way or another. I will say, however, that this was great, and I’m so happy I finally got to see something OT on the big screen.
37) Bill & Ted Face the Music (dir. Dean Parisot) – 18/09
A joy. I’m new to Bill and Ted, I only watched the first two for the first time leading up to this. I found this a wonderfully uncynical and just fun time, and it wasn’t trying to be much else other than that. Sure, some of the CG isn’t… good, but that’s easily looked past when you have the joy that is a killer robot named Dennis. Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter slip back into this series so well, and it’s nice to see them do something slightly more than just having them be exactly the same. The song they play at the wedding is a bop as well.
38) The Broken Hearts Gallery (dir. Natalie Krinsky) – 22/09
I knew very little about this going in and was pleasantly surprised by it. I like Dacre Montgomery as an actor, and I enjoyed seeing him here. I don’t have that much to say, it’s a perfectly watchable rom-com. I will say that I think Phillipa Soo is miscast, not because she’s a bad actor, she’s great, but more because she is noticeably 5 years older than Viswanathan and Gordon, despite the fact that they’re meant to be the same age. The film opens with a flashback to high school, and I can buy Viswanathan and Gordon as high-schoolers (hell, since Booksmart Gordon’s coded as a high-schooler in my head anyway), but Soo just sticks out like a sore thumb and doesn’t seem to fit quite as well in this friend group unfortunately.
39) La Haine (dir. Mathieu Kassovitz) – 24/09
A film I had heard great things about, but didn’t really know anything about. So come it having a bring back screening I went without really looking up anything. It’s a damn good film, and a timely bring back considering the big anti-police sentiment brought back up around then. I like seeing toxic masculinity and gang issues from places other than the US and London, so seeing a film titled ‘hate’ in the language of love is interesting and cool without necessarily being intentional.
40) Mamma Mia! (dir. Phyllida Lloyd) – 25/09
Now, I really like musicals, I also really like a dumb musical, hell, the High School Musical films are some of my favourite movies (don’t ask). This was my first proper watch through of Mamma Mia however. It’s always been something I’ve been decently aware of, it’s been on in the background as my mum watches it or something, but it’s not something I’ve ever properly watched. Now I have, I can fairly happily say that it’s not very good. Mostly because everyone is drunk as hell. The choreo, especially when it’s not big group numbers, is virtually non-existant – Meryl Streep just ends up writhing on a roof at one point. The film’s redeeming qualities are the songs, but that’s just because it’s ABBA, and ABBA pretty much only produced bops. I will also say that it’s the first film since Jurassic World that I’ve left to piss during, so take that as you will.
41) Tenet (dir. Christopher Nolan) – 28/09 (Round Two)
Robert Pattinson has natural charisma, so he elevates the writing far beyond what it is. They let Elizabeth Debecki be tall thank fuck, and whilst I don’t necessarily click into it, she does end up being the emotional core of the film. The film is best in the second act when it’s actively palindroming, and by the time we get to the last act, we’ve burnt through all of the things we care about, so it just turns into a macguffin quest third act. Despite colour coding the troops in either direction, I don’t know what is happening throughout most of the final battle, and there’s very little in the way of reversals and/or beats to follow. There’s the cool bit where the tower blows up twice, but that’s kinda it for any proper moments I give a shit about in that final act.
42) The Lighthouse (dir. Robert Eggers) – 29/09 (Round Two)
I don’t have much to say here, it’s a great film and I wanted to see it in the cinema again when I had the chance to. I will say that this screening was a weird one, as I wondered whether they’d fucked up when the kids movie trailers played before it (as a side note, pretty much a year of the same Minions: The Rise of Gru and Peter Rabbit 2 trailers get old fast), but luckily the Lighthouse did indeed play and not whatever family film they had in stock then.
43) After We Collided (dir. Roger Kumble) – 01/10
OK, this feels like it will take some explaining. I knew absolutely nothing about this film going in, and I mean nothing. I knew it was a romantic film from the poster and that was it. I only went because it was the only new film showing in my local Odeon that I hadn’t seen (side note: Odeon Limitless is great). So, when that Wattpad logo came up my heart sank. I was already worried by the ‘scenes of sexual assault’ or whatever came up in the BBFC certification warning before the film. To start with: I am an idiot. I thought this film had the redeeming quality of ‘being smart and setting itself after a traditional romantic movie would end’, unfortunately upon leaving and googling, I realised my mistake and found that it was, in fact, a sequel. So that was it’s big redeeming feature gone. The performances, especially from the lead guy, are awful. One of the Sprouse brothers is decent enough, which hurts the film because he has way more charisma, and as such more chemistry, with the lead girl. About the lead guy, I would love to know how a British actor can do such a bad British accent, and how everything about him comes off as so wooden. It really hurts every scene he’s in. Every single location is an excuse for a sex scene, and boy are those sex scenes… weird. Because of the complete lack of chemistry between the leads, the scenes already are wooden and on top of that, there’s a bizarre aversity to real nudity, despite the rating. Bear in mind I really don’t want porn, but in a movie so populated by sex, you want something a bit… more. Hell, there are moments where the camera will begin to pan down, but then wuss out before any cleavage is hit and immediately pan back up again. However, because of general film language, it still feels somewhat erotic, so it’s this weird clash of erotic and really stale. I will say, however, as one last thing (I could talk about this movie’s problems for hours), that the film did seem to work on its target audience. I was alone in a screening apart from a group of mid-teen girls (yep, it was indeed, awkward), and they giggled every time a sex scene started so who am I to judge?
44) Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (dir. Nick Park, Steve Box) – 04/10
I love stop motion, I love Aardman (god tier British film staple), ergo I love Wallace and Gromit. I love rewatching all 4 shorts and this film is similarly excellent. I was very happy to see this show up in the cinema listings and was even happier to go and see it. One weird detail I will say is that they seemed to have the American print, as references to Gromit’s marrow were replaced by references to a melon instead, which is worrying that I even noticed, one of my nerdier filmwatching moments for sure.
45) Akira (dir. Katsuhiro Otomo) – 07/10
Another movie I probably should have seen by now and just hadn’t. And as with everything else, if I was going to have a first watch anywhere, it would be in the cinema. Akira isn’t what I expected, I don’t know what I expected, or how I had avoided all plot information, but here we are. I really enjoyed it, and it’s damn good, but having only watched it the once, I fear I have little to say.
46) Saint Maud (dir. Rose Glass) – 09/10
I really really enjoyed this. Twisting the typical possession narrative into a ‘god is the possessor’ thing is neat. The film keeps itself unclear throughout, so you never know truly whether there is something divine, or whether there’s something wrong with Maud. Morfydd Clark is a really talented actor, and it’s been great to see her in more and more stuff over the past couple of years. I also really appreciate that this is a sub 1 hour 30 minute movie, always nice to have one of those. Despite its short running time, however, it still manages to keep a fairly slow and cerebral pace, which I appreciated here.
47) Kajillionaire (dir. Miranda July) – 12/10
I have a decently high tolerance for ‘quirk’ so I enjoyed this a lot. I cared about the central characters, and it’s always nice to see a film just get gayer in a nice way as it continues. The cast are all fantastic, you really buy into this recessed central character, and their parents are truly frustrating in a good way. Scenes like the one at the dying man’s house are truly touching and I’m very happy I watched it.
48) Booksmart (dir. Olivia Wilde) – 13/10
Booksmart is one of my favourite movies of 2019, and I’m very pissed at myself that I missed it when it came to cinemas. So when I saw that this bring back screening was happening I jumped at the chance to watch it yet again, but this time on the big screen. I love everything about this film, the cast are all fantastically charismatic and I love all of them equally (OK, maybe Billie Lourd edges out above the rest as Gigi. The jokes and characterisations are all fantastic and Olivia Wilde is a confident director, especially for a debut. If you haven’t seen it, I very much recommend it.
49) The Cabin in the Woods (dir. Drew Goddard) – 15/10
I don’t need to say much here, it’s Cabin in the Woods, a modern horror comedy classic. It’s just a dang good time at the movies and plays with the conventions of horror really well. It’s certainly a better movie to last see at the cinema before it closes for months than My Spy.
OH NO LOCKDOWN TWO HIT
50) Wonder Woman 1984 (dir. Patty Jenkins) – 16/12
OK, this is new as hell so I’ll keep it vague, but I really really enjoyed this. It’s such a relief to have something so hopeful and lacking in cynicism come out after the year we’ve had. I massively prefer this over the first film, and the plot went in ways I really didn’t expect. I was surprised at how well Steve was integrated into the story, I was expecting something far less useful to the character progressions and plot. The villains are great, certainly far better than whatever Ares was in the first and the just nothing that was Dr Poison. Pedro Pascal is a delight as is Kristin Wiig. Would very much recommend to anyone who just wants something light after this dark ass year.
51) Better Watch Out (dir. Chris Peckover) – 17/12
I’ve talked a few times about films I knew nothing about here, but boy was this a film I knew NOTHING about. I went on a bit of a Christmas horror kick in the days preceding this after watching Krampus one night. I saw this during a google search of ‘christmas horror’ and expected home alone but bloodier. The first act sure delivers on that idea, and, although I was enjoying it, I was put off by the whole babysitter crush thing (Spoilered because I didn't know about this aspect going in). However, then the film twisted, hard, and I had absolutely no idea where the film was going from then on. I’m overall quite mixed on the film and genuinely can’t work out whether I really enjoyed it, or whether it was a real bad time. Honestly, your feelings on it will probably be down to how long you can stand watching a woman be gagged and bound, and your tolerance for child acting. It’s certainly an interesting one that I’m glad I watched.
52) Home Alone (dir. Chris Columbus) – 19/12
From a film that I thought would be Home Alone (and even features a few nods to it), to actual Home Alone. One of the few proper holiday staples I have, for whatever reason I don’t watch something like Muppet Christmas Carol or Elf every year as I should, but Home Alone? Yep. Catherine O’Hara is the shining star of this film, I love her and everything she does. Kevin is occasionally accidentally framed in much the same way that Michael Myers is in Halloween (ominously staring into houses with people in) which is funny. My commentaries are getting less and less as movies I’ve seen plenty of times increase in number, can you tell?
53) Pixie (dir. Barnaby Thompson) – 20/12
The last new film I saw this year, and it was a pretty good one. I really love seeing quaint, kinda shitty representations of things that are usually seen as cool and slick like mobsters in this case. Rural Irish gangsters is just a fun concept and I enjoy seeing this as kinda an anti-Calm with Horses, where that was straight drama, this is far more comedic. I also like seeing gun-toting priests, and Alec Baldwin seems to be having a lot of fun in that role. I will also say that I’m a big advocate of church fights in movies, and this has a whole church shootout so that’s an absolute win that automatically makes me like it a whole lot.
54) The Muppet Christmas Carol (dir. Brian Henson) – 21/12
Why isn’t this a film I watch every damn year?! I love the Muppets, I love this film… why isn’t this a staple of mine?! Michael Caine is delightful, the Muppets are delightful, the songs are delightful. How Brian Henson goes from directing films like this to the Happytime Murders hurts my soul. Also, if Disney can just do… more with the Muppets that’d be great. I know their new shows don’t do well, and that’s because you’re fucking up the whole point of the Muppets. Just do a new good variety show or do a good new movie. Thanks Disney.
55) Love Actually (dir. Richard Curtis) – 21/12
Emma Thompson singlehandedly carries this film. The scene of her crying in the bedroom is just so damn good that it makes up for all the weird 2003 fat jokes, the goddamn placard bit and the children love plot. Hugh Grant is also delightful, him doing his thing in anything is just lovely to watch as is. Bill Nighy is also great, and his whole plotline is just nice. I will say that with as many plotlines and romances as this film has, it would be nice to have seen some g’dang gay representation, and it got so close with Nighy but wimped out really. Otherwise, pretty good and enjoyable Christmas romcom, nothing overly complicated or amazing, but it doesn’t need to be.
56) Elf (dir. Jon Favreau) – 23/12
Again, something that I feel I should probably watch more often and haven’t seen since my childhood. It’s a lovely simple Christmas film and knows it. The design of the North Pole is great, I adore the stop motion animals and painted/model backdrops. The whole ‘Christmas spirit’ thing is standard fare, but hey, I certainly don’t need anything bigger plot-wise here. I don’t need to give a recommendation or anything… it’s bloody Elf, you’ve probably seen it.

And that was all 56 times I went to the cinema, I’m over 6,600 words in so I won’t go on for too much longer, but for the films that did come out, it’s not been a bad year in film.
I do wish I’d been able to see more, my aim was to get to 150 (preferably 200) films seen in the cinema this year but obviously that didn’t happen. I’m really hoping that next year improves as the vaccine rollout continues, but only time will tell. Fingers crossed. In terms of the amount that I did go, 56 isn't too bad considering that for 2/3 of the year the cinema was closed, so I am happy about that one.
I do apologise that After We Collided is somehow the film I talked about the most, but just know that I could have kept going for so much longer, so you were spared from that.
I hope you all had a good year in film-watching as well, and I’m excited to see what comes out going forward.

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Passed - 1st Attempt. Thoughts, Tips, Facts

After 5 months of study, I passed on my first attempt! As many before me have been prone to do, I decided to write down my thoughts and experiences in the hope that others can better their own pursuit.
Fast Facts:

With all documentable exercises, extra mile exercises, course reading, and extra research, I spent 200.5 hours on the course material.
- I did not use the videos except when something in the book was confusing and seeing someone do it was needed, like navigating Immunity Debugger. Unless you’re an auditory learner, the videos are verbatim from the book so skip them.
I spent a total of 154.25 hours over 73 calendar days (28 usable days due to work) and broke into 40 machines in the labs, including the “Big 4” (I actually found 3 of the 4 to be not so bad, and one that isn’t in the group to be much harder). That brings the total course expenditure of time to 354.75 hours.
I did another 22 machines from TJNull’s Hack the Box list while waiting for my exam date after labs ended. I found these less helpful but it helps keep up muscle memory. I didn't track this as closely, but I'd estimate another 75-80 hours here.
On exam day, I got the necessary points to pass in under 7 hours and stopped to write my report to ensure I had all screenshots necessary for the report before terminating access. Confirmation took only 36 hours.

Background
I actually have a liberal arts background, starting my career with a double major in Political Science and International Affairs and going into government work for 5 years. During that time, I found that, though I enjoyed many elements of it, there weren’t enough appealing career options to sustain the next 40 years of my life. I built my first computer during my first degree and loved it, so after weighing my options I went back to school while working to get a Computer Science degree. I was also fortunate to shift my analytic work to a cybersecurity focus, looking at systems from a ‘red team’ perspective and passing my analysis to the organization’s actual red team for exploitation.
While I know everyone says it, red team is where I want to be. Not because it’s sexy and hyped up in movies, but because I love the mindset. I love taking something, be it an abstract political argument or a technical implementation, and finding the holes in it to then make it better or plan mitigations against.
After finishing my degree, I leveraged that experience and degree into a System Security Engineer & Security Control Assessor position where I am now. My certifications were more on the management and policy side with CISSP and Sec+ to meet job requirements. I knew of attacks and things to do to mitigate against them, but I hadn’t actually done them, and because my background was in analysis I didn’t have the technical foundation of a system administrator beyond what I learned in school.
The First Steps
I’ve known for a few years I wanted to take on the OSCP. I love a challenge, I love learning, and while I have no intention of being a paper tiger flitting from certification to certification, the structure of a class that covered as much ground as the OSCP was appealing in a world where there almost infinite directions in which to take off. A big obstacle, though, was the amount of travel I do for my job. Enter COVID.
I started building a home lab last year to get better at system administration and eventually turn it into a ‘purple team’ lab environment – experimenting with vulnerabilities and seeing what gets caught. I didn’t make it as far as I wanted, but when COVID hit and travel ceased, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to jump in and signed up for 90 days in the 2020 course. I worked through Over the Wire’s Bandit and Natas games to brush up on my Linux terminal and web app attacks while waiting for my time to start. April 26th arrived quickly and it was time to go.
The ~~Grind~~ Course
The 2020 material, if you haven’t heard, is much more robust than the previous iteration. Weighing in at over 850 pages, the PDF is a mammoth undertaking that is often high level and requires additional research. My COVID schedule at work dropped down to either 3 or 4 days in the office for 12 hour days, leaving me 3-4 day weekends to devote to the material. My plan was to get through the material and exercises by the end of May, leaving me 60 for the labs. I also planned to do the exercises and lab report, because who wants to pass up 5 points (see lesson learned...)?
With that goal in mind, I generated a spreadsheet breaking down the chapters and sections into chunks of around 45 pages each, give or take a few to hit a natural break point. I also went a little overboard and started throwing metrics against it to estimate actual time to complete each chapter based on length, my familiarity with the topic, and how much of the section was reading vs. screenshots to offset the length.
My estimate came out to almost 60 days which disappointed me. Thankfully, though, I was about 25% off in my estimates as some of the material was not as difficult as anticipated. 47 calendar days later (30 of which were spent studying), I was through the material and was ready to start the labs. I treated myself to a weekend off, first, because working 12 hour days in the office and about 8 hour days at home for a month and a half was brutal.
Lessons Learned/Advice:

Read the syllabus and do as much as you can ahead of time. I planned to, but COVID changed those plans. If you can get comfortable in some of the low-hanging fruit like navigating Linux, web app attacks, etc., you can save yourself a lot of time here.
I do not recommend doing the lab report. OffSec really needs to re-evaluate what’s required to get the 5 bonus points given the sheer scope of the new material. Many of the exercises are not helpful in, or sometimes counterproductive to, completing course objectives. What benefit is there in taking 10 different screenshots of starting a netcat listener when you will do that several hundred times? How are you supposed to document TheHarvester output when the IPs are constantly getting blocked by search engines?
- That said: do some of the exercises. I did reference the exercises I had done for things like Active Directory attacks and SSH tunneling. They aren’t all useless, just be judicious in what you spend your time on.
- Also do write up some of the lab machines. I learned a lot how my report writing differed from what they were looking for by writing up a few test cases and adjusted for the exam. What they’re looking for is more of a step-by-step write-up and not what I would consider information to put in a professional report.
Be prepared to do a lot of individual research. Some of the sections are simply “Here’s this tool, it’s cool, you should read about it more.”
Find a good community to get help. I did not do this and thought I could rely on the forums and admins. The forums are OK for the course material, but there’s a time delay in getting help and when you get to the labs people start getting a little silly. The admins were only helpful a handful of times, they take the mantra of ‘Try Harder’ a little too far. It’s a course and people are trying to learn, but despite being the providers they aren’t there to teach apparently. There were several times I came in with a specific problem and demonstrated the research I had done to try to solve it myself, but got a very obtuse answer or, on at least one occasion, accused of just wanting answers and not trying.

The Labs
Having sprinted through the material, I settled into a little more friendly pace for the labs; I aimed for a box per day for the first few weeks to ease into it and give myself a little more balance in life. If I did the box in 2 hours, great. If I did it in 8, great. Toward the end I started doing more in a day if I finished one quickly. I ended up extending another 30 days because I wasn’t feeling ready by the end of my initial 90 and lost a lot of time in June due to work.
I started with the two boxes OffSec has write-ups for, doing them myself first and then reading the write-ups to see their methodology or find things I had missed. I’d highly recommend folks take that approach.
The labs aren’t meant to be done sequentially. I found that I did better getting access through web applications, so I started by knocking down anything with port 80 or 443 open. I pivoted into another of the sub networks but decided to finish out the public network before diving further into those. I only took down one of the domains in the public network; it was interesting, but after doing it once it was not how I wanted to spend my limited time.
I used CherryTree to document my exploits, taking notes on what caused me to stumble, what worked for the box in case I needed to come back, open ports, credentials, and installed software. You never know what might show up elsewhere. I also documented 12 boxes fully for my lab report so I could pick the 10 that were the clearest. I started my cheat sheet from the course material and added to it as I found myself using things over and over, again in Cherry Tree.
If you undertake this journey, make sure you enumerate after rooting a box. You’ll often find things that lead to other machines. I do appreciate that aspect of the labs relative to HTB where you’re in and out and there isn’t much to it. Some folks have complained about not knowing if a box is dependent; that’s part of the game. If you’re in the real world, you’ll need to go with the flow, not just have one-off attacks against everything. That said, the lab is time limited and not free, so if you get a suspicion a box requires something else, you can always check the forums.
Oh, the forums. Sometimes a source of aid, sometimes a source of drivel. If you plan to take the course, please do not become one of the people that posts “OS-ID – Rooted” and then nothing of substance. But more than that, don’t become one of the people who calls using an SMB exploit “the Brazilian dancer” or running an exploit file in Python “using the snake.” It’s silly, it’s not helpful, and it’s pointless. I think folks on the forum have internalized the attitude of the admins – figure it out on your own, but here’s an obtuse tip so I can feel like I tried to help. OffSec does not want, nor should takers of the course want, direct spoilers because the goal is to build a methodology of figuring problems out, but that does not mean people need to be anti-helpful in a learning environment.
I felt like the labs were where the real money is made. The course was a pretty good foundation (augmented with external information, as mentioned earlier), but doing is how you’ll solidify what you read. Over the course of the lab, the number of times I needed hints went down as did my average time to root.
Lessons Learned/Advice:

The times I needed the forum, I could usually find a post that gave me enough to get moving in the right direction. Some folks say to avoid the forums, but you need to know yourself. It should not become a crutch, but banging your head against a wall is equally unhelpful. This is a learning experience, so learn. Just make sure you take solid notes on why you got stuck, the hint that helped you, and the lesson from it to carry forward to the future. The lessons I learned from my rookie mistakes early on were crucial to my success on the exam.
There are enough boxes in the public network to fill up lab time. One of the subnets is not hard to get into, so it’s worth trying out your port tunneling skills to practice, but it can get frustrating when your hop point keeps getting reset by other students.
Don’t go on the forum to rage when someone resets your box, but also don’t be the guy (or gal) who resets a box that was reset an hour ago. Respect others and modify your plan.
Take notes. Take lots of notes. You’ll need to build your documentation methodology as much as your enumeration methodology. The last thing you want to do is get into a box but not remember the command that got you there, particularly when your whole grade rests upon reporting it.
I wouldn’t do this every time, but practice cleaning up after yourself instead of just nuking the box. Sometimes that was as insightful as getting in in the first place.

The In-Between
At the end of the labs, I picked a date a few weeks out to allow me to take some privilege escalation courses and practice on Hack the Box (and because all the good times were taken… people aren’t kidding about slots filling up quickly). I went with The Cyber Mentor’s Linux and Windows privilege escalation courses, but I have heard Tib3rius is also useful. I thought it was a quick, but helpful, tour around options. He does rely heavily on scripts or executables to do the enumeration, so don’t expect to come out with a long list of manual commands to run, but it was good to level-set and helped build my enumeration checklist further.
I signed up for Hack the Box VIP to follow along in the class and do some further practice. I had pretty good success with some of the early boxes I picked from the TJNull OSCP-like list, but as I got closer to my exam and toward the bottom of the list, the boxes became a lot more of a CTF than OSCP-like. This hurt my confidence a little bit, as privilege escalation turned into hunting for strange files rather than what I experienced in the labs.
I did the same as I did in the labs: take notes on what caused me to stumble or look at a hint, what worked, what didn’t. All of that was crucial to my game plan for the exam. In all, I did 22 of the machines from Hack the Box. It was worth the month’s subscription fee, but don’t put too much stock in the boxes’ similarity to the OSCP.
The Exam and Report
This section will be vague for obvious reasons. I picked an 8 AM start time. That gave me enough time to wake up at my normal time (5:45), get breakfast, fire up my VM and set up my notes, play some drums and guitar to settle down, and start my check-in a little early. My webcam did not auto-focus, but they let me take a photo of my ID and display it on my computer with the screenshare. This took almost all of the 15 minutes and a few more minutes after getting my VPN.
I set up a new tmux session for each machine I worked on to log my output appropriately. I recommend getting a good strategy down so it becomes automatic and you don’t miss anything bouncing around. My strategy, like many, was to fire off my AutoRecon scans while I worked on the buffer overflow. The buffer overflow took me an hour, mostly because I was paranoid about documenting each step. The course is sufficient to pass this.
After the buffer overflow I took a break. In fact, I took breaks every 60 minutes, setting an alarm across the room that was annoying enough to make me get up to turn it off. I cannot stress enough how important it is to take regular breaks. Over the 7 hours I took 6 breaks ranging from 5 to 20 minutes. 3 of those 6 breaks led to an immediate breakthrough in either gaining access or escalating my privileges. This was something I was bad at in the labs, and it showed.
I took a look at my scan results and went for a 20-point machine. About 1.5 hours later I had access and another 45 minutes later had root. I took on the second 20-point machine and had access after 10 minutes and root after another 50 minutes. The 10-pointer took about 1.5 hours to get access due to a rabbit hole, giving me a passing grade. A fist-pump and break later, I decided to hold off on the 25-point box to start writing my report and ensure I had all the screenshots and code snippets I needed.
I gave the 25-point box a stab starting at about 6pm and identified a few possible entrance vectors, but after 2 hours of experimenting I couldn’t get anything to work and decided to end my exam rather than stay up late. My type-A personality wasn’t a huge fan of this, but it was the right decision.
A good night’s sleep later, I spent another few hours formatting and cleaning up my report. As mentioned earlier, I put way more detail into it than I would ordinarily put for a report like that, but I did not want to fail for not providing a “copy-paste” approach to my exploits. After double checking I had all of the proof files included and that I appropriately archived the files, I posted them up and sent the email.
A short 36 hours later I got the wonderful email saying I passed.
Tips

Take breaks. Take them regularly, take them often. I felt a sinking feeling during my first 20-point box not seeing an access vector. I took 10 minutes, walked around, did a few pushups, sat back down and immediately saw what I needed.
Print a reminder and stick it to your screen telling yourself to keep it simple and take a deep breath when you’re feeling stuck.
Enumerate, try, enumerate harder, try harder. I always wondered why the OSCP was considered “entry level” when it’s so difficult, I think I understand now: it’s not entry level in terms of technical knowledge, it’s entry level in that you do not need to recreate any kind of wheel.
Have a cheat sheet, but don’t stress too much about it. Some folks are hunting for all the sheets. This is what Google is for. Have the things you use regularly close-by (for example, set up an easy transfer folder in your home directory so you don’t need to type /usshare/windows-resources/… when you just want to put netcat on the system). Have a checklist for enumeration. Beyond that, if you don’t have what you need you can easily find it online.

Final thoughts and resources
To be perfectly honest, I was a little disappointed with the PWK itself. It’s nice to have a vast amount of data consolidated into a tight syllabus, but there’s zero teaching involved beyond reading the material. Some of this is good to foster research and problem-solving skills, but it hits a point where it’s not a great learning environment. That said, this past 5 months was a roller coaster of highs and lows and one that I enjoyed riding. The value of practical exams over multiple choice is huge and I feel much more accomplished than any paper test I have taken so far. Here’s to more, just maybe after a little break.
Resources
Enumeration:
Auto Recon – I used the default scan and then augmented in any areas that required further looks (e.g. a more intensive dirbustegobuster list).
linPEAS/winPEAS – far and away the best privilege escalation tool I used. winPEAS does require .NET 4.5 or greater so it won’t work everywhere.
accesschk.exe – Get it from xor.cat which has an old version with the /accepteula flag

https://xor.cat/2017/09/05/sysinternals-accesschk-accepteula/

Honorable mentions: linenum, linux-exploit-suggester, windows-exploit-suggester, Sherlock, PowerUp
Privilege Escalation:
Windows
https://www.absolomb.com/2018-01-26-Windows-Privilege-Escalation-Guide/
https://github.com/swisskyrepo/PayloadsAllTheThings/blob/masteMethodology%20and%20Resources/Windows%20-%20Privilege%20Escalation.md
https://book.hacktricks.xyz/windows/checklist-windows-privilege-escalation
https://sushant747.gitbooks.io/total-oscp-guide/content/privilege_escalation_windows.html
https://github.com/SecWiki/windows-kernel-exploits
Linux
https://blog.g0tmi1k.com/2011/08/basic-linux-privilege-escalation/
https://sushant747.gitbooks.io/total-oscp-guide/content/privilege_escalation_-_linux.html
https://book.hacktricks.xyz/linux-unix/linux-privilege-escalation-checklist
https://github.com/swisskyrepo/PayloadsAllTheThings/blob/masteMethodology%20and%20Resources/Linux%20-%20Privilege%20Escalation.md
https://github.com/lucyoa/kernel-exploits
Random:
https://hashcat.net/wiki/doku.php?id=example_hashes

Nugu Roundup #60 - When Proud Pied April, Dress'd in all his trim, Hath put a Spirit of Youth in Every Thing- 201011 + Album Giveaway

Hello and welcome to the latest Nugu Roundup!
What is this?: This is a weekly feature designed to highlight the unknown/underappreciated groups and soloists working hard in the Kpop world that often fall under the radar. Please share your own information, favorite performance videos, fanmeet stories, or anything else relevant below!
Last week we spent time with Dreamcatcher's little brothers, D1CE! This week let's check out a group that's more on the 'underrated' side than the 'nugu' side, let's get to know April!
Look at the first comment below for the winner of the fourteenth Nugu Roundup Album Giveaway, plus details on this week's album up for grabs!
What is Nugu?: While in Korean it literally means 'Who' in the broader Kpop context it refers to groups that are generally unknown amongst the greater public. It doesn't have to mean they're extremely new, though it can, and there are of course varying degrees of 'unknown' which some groups having very strong niche fandoms and others being almost invisible. I take a fairly broad view and will include groups that may be known to some, but who don't have widespread name recognition.
Let's get on with the show...
________________________________________________________
APRIL
Who are they?: April is a six member girl group under DSP Media. While their name in Hangul 에이프릴 phonetically sounds much like 'April' it's also a compound word of 'A Frill' indicating they are pretty women, and with the April name means they want to present a warm and relaxing atmosphere like the month of April. Their fandom name is Fineapple, which is a combination of "Fine" meaning good, and "Apple" representing April.
Company: DSP Media was originally one of the largest Kpop companies in the game, representing mega-hit artists such as Fin.K.L, SECHSKIES, and KARA. They lost ground in the transition from 2nd to 3rd generation groups and now represent April and co-ed group KARD. They also have a pre-debut 9 member boy group in development including two Produce X101 contestants. Other notable former artists include the girl group Rainbow and boy groups SS501 and A-JAX.
Group Interviews

Members

Chaekyung
- Position: Leader, Vocalist
- Real Name: Yoon Chae Kyung
- Age: 24 (IA)
- Facts: She is a former member of short-lived DSP Media group Puretty. She competed on Produce 101, falling just outside the top, and also in the Kara Project. She joined April following the departure of original members Somin (now a member of KARD) and Hyunjoo (who left to pursue acting). In addition to her time with Puretty she has been part of the special project groups CIVA and IBI. She has performed voice acting work for the animated TV series Pretty Rhythm Dear My Future, and has appeared in the dramas Secret Love, Boni-Hana Web Drama, Mohae Mohae, and Everyone's Love. While she was thrust into the position of leader due to her eldest-in-the-group-status she says that the other members have been invaluable in showing her the ropes since she joined the group after debut and she is known for having a beagle-like personality and playing around with her group-mates. She has practiced Muay-Thai and would like to learn Jiu-Jitsu. She was a trainee for over six years. She has mentioned that she has quite a bit of trainee debt still from her time in Puretty but has been paying it down and it now isn't as bad as it used to be. She has released a duet with fellow April member Chaewon called Clock (MV) and has collaborated with Voisper for Lovesome (MV), as well as releasing a special project single called Yellow (audio).
Chaewon
- Position: Main Vocalist, Rapper
- Real Name: Kim Chae Won
- Age: 22 (IA)
- Self Introduction
- Facts: She is from Gongju, a small mountainous city in west-central Korea. She briefly assumed the role of leader in the group following the departure of Somin and before the addition of Chaekyung. She took part in the KARA Project. She is known as the mother of the group and has adopted mannerisms of an older lady on occasion. She has been in the Web Dramas Reply PyeongChang 100° F and Third Person Dating and has taken part in live theater with Hello, Malpan. She has a personal YouTube channel where she posts song covers and other content (link). In addition to her duet with Chaekyung she released a special winter duet with Somin called Me Inside You (audio) (that probably sounds better in Korean), and several OST tracks including I Need You (audio) with Kisum, Alone Again (audio) with Lee Jinsol, I Cried Loudly (MV) with Ha Hyeong On, and Humming (audio) with Daewon. She joined DSP Media as a trainee while she was still attending school and rode the bus from Gongju to Seoul and back again every day for practice. She was an excellent student and was in the running for 1st in her class. She attended Sungshin Women's University along with Chaekyung and the two have become close friends within the group. She is a big fan of pistachio nuts and enjoys cracking and snacking on them.
Naeun
- Position: Vocalist, Rapper
- Real Name: Lee Na Eun
- Age: 21 (IA)
- Self Introduction
- Facts: She is from Daejon, a city in central Korea known as Korea's Silicon Valley. She is a former JYP Trainee, leaving just before the Sixteen survival show due to opposition from her parents and lacking confidence in her abilities, but is still close with a number of members from Twice. She studied acting after leaving JYP and has appeared in a number of dramas including Extraordinary You and A-Teen. She has released duets with fellow-member Jinsol including My Story (MV), and Matter of Time (MV), as well as an OST Stars in the Night Sky (audio). She has been a special MC on Music Bank. She is known to be a very kind person and volunteered to work with disabled people in her youth and was also known as someone who would buy food for her friends when they were hungry and had no money. One of her favorite foods is makchang, which is grilled intestines, and she loves maesil-cha, a green plum drink. She was falsely accused of school bullying but the accuser then retracted the statement and said he made it all up. She obtained her driver's license this year.
Yena
- Position: Main Dancer, Leap Rapper, Vocalist
- Real Name: Yang Yena
- Age: 20 (IA)
- Self Introduction
- Facts: She is from Daegu, and inland city in Southeastern Korea known for it's high prevalence of Buddhism and a growing fashion industry. She is known in the team for being forward with skinship and also developed a reputation for a tsundere-like attitude. She is said to resemble Goo Hara in both visuals and voice. She was an MC along with fellow-member Rachel for an MBC Children's Song show. She has recently been cast in what is being billed as the world's first 8K UHD Musical Film called K-School which will debut this December in Korea. She is the most courageous member and was the first in line to go on a bungee-jumping ride when the group went to an amusement park, however she is afraid of cats and has alluded to a negative childhood experience with them. She has been given the nickname 'Squirrel' but doesn't like it, and has been attempting to switch her nickname to 'Po-Do' which means 'Grape'. Bread is her favorite food.
Rachel
- Position: Main Rapper, Lead Dancer, Vocalist
- Real Name: Sung Na Yeon
- Age: 20 (IA)
- Facts: She joined the group with Chaekyung after the departure of Somin and Hyunjoo. She is originally from Seoul but studied abroad in Portland, OR for four years before returning to Korea. Her stage name is the English name she used when studying abroad. She chose to keep it as there are many Nayeons and Naeuns in Kpop and thought it would be less confusing. She has been practicing ballet since she was 7 years old. She is known as the most innocent and childlike of the members of the team, but is also a very hard worker and was seen putting in extra practice time to catch up after joining the group late. Due to her thicker tone and English proficiency she is often given contrasting rap parts to Yena. She used her ballet skills to win April's first gold medal at the ISAC competition for Rhythm Gymnastics. In addition to English and Korean she can speak some German and is learning Japanese. Her favorite foods are eggs, spring rolls, and red bean porridge.
Jinsol
- Position: Lead Vocalist, Maknae
- Real Name: Lee Jin Sol
- Age: 18 (IA)
- Self Introduction
- Facts: She moved around a lot growing up, born in Andong and living in Taebaek and Yongin before moving to Seoul. Her parents initially opposed her becoming a singer but she attended a singing school secretly and when she invited them to a performance they relented and supported her dream. She competed on Girl Spirit though was placed in the same group as Kim Bohyung, Uji, and Sojung and thus didn't make the finals, however it was seen as a good showcase for the new group. Though she is the youngest she's the tallest member of the group. She is also known for having a very slim physique. She was a fixture on the show Tok Tok Boni Hani. She has acted in the drama "Met You Again". She has recorded several OST tracks including Perfect (audio), This Love (audio), I Was Wrong (MV), and Like This (MV). Her parents run a restaurant specializing in fried pork. She has been learning how to box. She's a fan of Pentatonix, Billy Eilish, and DJ Khaled. Her favorite foods are sweet and sour pork, dumplings, and chocolate. She is said to resemble Nagyung from Fromis_9.

Debut: August 23rd, 2015 with Dream Candy (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: Described as a 'House style dance track with fantasy elements' this ultra-cute and innocent (seriously, there's a frickin' unicorn) song was the lead single for the group's first EP "Dreaming". Come for Somin in a dirndl, stay for the charming and delightful song that sounds a bit Christmassy.
Composers/Producers: Butterfly (KNK - Knock, Gugudan - Wonderland, Forestella - The Reason Why)

First Comeback: November 24th, 2015 with Muah (MV) Live Stage (Link) Dance Practice (Link)

Song: The group's first comeback, and first song following the departure of Somin who decided April's concept wasn't for her, this was the promoted song from the group's first single album "Boing Boing". Another ultra-cute song, this one sees the girls dreaming of their first kiss and flirting with a mysterious Caucasian model who stumbled into their Catholic High School/Girl Scout Camp/'50s Diner. It's listed as a 'pop dance song full of exciting beats, a splendid melody, and freshness'.
Composers/Producers: MachWave (Rainbow - A Little More, KARA - Dreamlover), Lee Jeon Yoop (이준엽) (Unicorn - HUK, Hey Girls - No One But You, Kim Greem - My Love)

Second Comeback: December 20th, 2015 with Snowman (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: A Special Winter Single, this continues with April's magical-fairytale themes in a mid-tempo pop ballad that according to the producers "tells the story of loney little girls' love for snowmen".
Composers/Producers: Lee Juhyung (Monotree) (Weki Meki - Moya Moya, Stellar - Study, Ladies Code - My Flower), Kim Yooseok (Monotree) (Loona Haseul & Yeojin - My Melody, Loona OEC - Loonatic, Rainbow - Privacy), Asher Park (Loona - The Carol, Asher Park - On the Way, Mystic Puzzle - Like That Day)

Third Comeback: April 26th, 2016 with Tinkerbell (MV) Live Stage (Link) Dance Practice (Link)

Song: The lead single from the group's 2nd EP "Spring" the song is about "finding pretty love and becoming your own protagonist in a fairytale when you are tired of reality". It continues with the groups fairy-tale cute concept, and a lush instrumental backing with copious strings and synths sets the mood.
Composers/Producers: e.one (WJSN - Secret, GFriend - Gone with the Wind, Wonder Girls - I Feel You)

Fourth Comeback: January 3rd, 2017 with April Story (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: The title track of the group's third EP "Prelude" this sees the departure of Hyunjoo who left the group, but remained with DSP Media, to become an actress, and the addition of new members Chaekyung and Rachel. The song is a love song about unrequited love. This also sees the sound and image of the group transition a bit, still maintaining that magical fairlytale aura, but trading some of the playful cuteness for a GFriend-esque power-innocent concept which is also reflected in a more intense synchronized choreography. New member Rachel's ballet abilities are also highlighted.
Composers/Producers: e.one (see above)

Fifth Comeback: May 29th, 2017 with Mayday (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: The first promoted track from the group's 2nd single album "Mayday" this is described as an "Uptempo Arcade Pop Dance" song, and uses the metaphor of calling for a mayday to describe the excitement and butterflies felt when first falling in love. Some fun retro outfits are featured in the MV.
Composers/Producers: Dr.Jo (Princess Disease - Iced Coffee, Gugudan - A Girl Like Me, ELRIS - Heart Bank)

Fifth Comeback Pt 2: May 29th, 2017 with Lovesick (MV) Live Stage (Link)

Song: The second promoted track from their second single album "Mayday". This was originally released as part of the group's reality TV show on NaverTV "A-If-Ril" but due to the popularity of it received an MV and promotional release as well. The song is about unrequited love and features a swingy pop style.
Composers/Producers: e.one (see above)

Sixth Comeback: September 20th, 2017 with Take My Hand (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: The lead single from April's fourth EP "Eternity" this mid-tempo dance song is about metaphorical expressions of love and features an MV that trends the group's fairytale themes over towards magical realism as they turn back time to give themselves another shot at impressing a guy they fancy. Musically this hits me as a blend of GFriend and Lovelyz, and is the most mature sound from the group yet, with some very cool things going on in the chorus that I'd love u/givethatpitchvibrato to comment on if they'd like. Jinsol is also somehow a doppleganger for 2020 Park Gyuri three years ahead of time.
Composers/Producers: Jeong Ho Hyun (e.one) (Sonamoo - I Knew It, GFriend - Here We Are, Twice - Turtle), Choi Hyunjun (VOS) (WJSN - WW, Favorite - Where are you From?, IZ*ONE - Violeta)

Seventh Comeback: March 12th, 2018 with The Blue Bird (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: The lead single from the group's fifth EP "The Blue" this song is inspired by the fairy tale The Blue Bird) and expresses that "love and happiness can always be found". Musically the lush strings and synth arrangements from e.one (and their individual composers) continue to provide the elegant aural landscape that allows April's magical concepts to flourish.
Composers/Producers: Jeong Ho Hyun (e.one) (see above)

Eighth Comeback: October 16th, 2018 with Oh My Mistake (MV) Live Stage (Link) Choreography Video (Link)

Song: The lead single from the group's sixth EP "The Ruby" this marks the biggest departure from the sound the group had gradually been evolving since their debut and became their biggest commercial success to date along with becoming a fan favorite. Taking on a retro-'80s synthwave style the song is also a departure thematically in which the lyrics speak of confidence and control in seeking love with it being described by the producers as exhibiting "healthy narcicism" (and tellingly the Korean title of the song translates to "A Sin to be Pretty"). Bonus points for integrating a rap break without a slowdown in the tempo.
Composers/Producers: Tibian (타이비언) (Yoon Mirae - Lost, Kiss & Cry - Domino Game, Seulgi - Always), Nuplay (Yesung - It Has to be You, Day6 - Sing Me), Yejun Lee (no other credits found), MHL (MyTeen - She Bad, Grizzly - Paris Out, Eunha - Mr. Stranger)

Ninth Comeback: April 22nd, 2020 with Lalalilala (MV) Live Stage (Link) Dance Practice (Link)

Song: The lead single from the group's seventh EP "De Capo" this marks another departure in sound, and is described as a restart for the group which falls in line with the album title, Italian for "From the top". Taking the groups magical themes into a darker sci-fi realm mixed with cosmic influences that's reminiscent visually and musically of some of WJSN's recent work this is another step into a more mature presentation and sound for the group. According to the producers they worked to make sure each member received a 'killing part' and the strong chorus has been likened to KARA's output.
Composers/Producers: moonc (Loona Chu & Gowon - Seesaw, Gracie - Hustle, Woozi - Miracle), *Kang Myung Shin (*강명신) (IBI - Secretly, Apink - Ding Dong, Aqua - Log In)

Tenth (and most recent) Comeback: July 29th, 2020 with Now or Never (MV) Live Stage (Link) Dance Practice (Link)

Song: The promoted track from the group's first summer special single album "Hello Summer". It's described as 'Hybrid Pop' blending guitar and and a fun bouncy synth-brass line into an upbeat and addictive summer song which combine with bright and playful visuals to create a new look and sound for April.
Composers/Producers: Mayu Wakisaka (Ryu Sejeong - Tiger Eyes, Mamamoo - 4x4ever, Loona - Hi High), Appu Krishnan (Produce 101 - Pick Me, GOT7 - Trust My Love, Yoo Hwe Seung - Another Day), Keiichiro Katayama (no other credits found), 72 (Oh My Girl - Coloring Book, KARD - Red Moon, Everglow - Ladida)

YouTube Channel: April
Random Stuff

Trivia: On debut April was one of the youngest active Kpop groups, with an average age of 17.5. The group has a mascot, known as Sawori, which is a giant seed representing sprouting love and energy for the group. The group has amassed a number of CF deals including Mexican Chicken (a Korean chicken chain), FIFA Online, and a goat-milk face mask product. Their fandom name was the result of a fan vote and Fineapple narrowly beat out Aries as the top choice. Despite a long hiatus between The Ruby and De Capo the group seems to be gaining momentum, with their special summer album Hello Summer reaching 14,000 physical copies sold, the group's best thus far, while the group had never broken 10K before De Capo. Lalalilala also marked the group's highest single charting at 40 on the Gaon digital chart and 37 on Melon. As a fun little Easter-Egg the first letter of April's first three EPs (Dreaming, Spring, Prelude) spells out "DSP". The group has won three medals at ISAC competitions, all of them for Rhythm Gymnastics. The group is currently one of the longest-running active idol groups that has never won 1st place on a music show.
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SOLOIST OF THE WEEK
Woosung/Sammy
Who is he?: Woosung is the lead vocalist, guitarist, and leader of the band The Rose. He has released several solo songs and a solo EP but is also still active with his band.
Company: J&Star Entertainment appears to be a new and small company with The Rose being their only musical act, though they also represent a male model and actor by the name of Bonyoung.
Real Name: Kim Woo Sung (Korean) Sammy Kim (English)
Age: 27 (IA)
Pre-Release Debut: July 19th, 2019 with Lonely (audio) Live Performance (Link)

Song: A soulful R&B ballad with simple piano accompaniment which is described by Woosung as a healing song. This was released as a pre-release single ahead of his first album.
Composers/Producers: Woosung (original artist)

Official Solo Debut: July 25th, 2019 with Face (MV) Live Performance (Link)

Song: The promoted single from his debut EP "Wolf". Woosung stated that men are often compared to wolves in terms of being instinctual and aggressive, but he wanted to show the inner side of the wolf, the side that yearns to run with a pack to assuage loneliness and which mates for life. This particular song is about looking beyond first impressions and how everyone has loveliness regardless if they meet traditional beauty standards or not. Musically with a funk-infused pop sound that blends the elements of his music from his band with a more mainstream electronic pop genre it's unique and enjoyable.
Composers/Producers: Woosung (original artist)

First Comeback: November 15th, 2019 with Beautiful Girl feat. Penile (MV) Live Performance (Link)

Song: Released as a single album, this is a song Woosung wrote 5 years prior to release and decided to polish for actual release. It's described as a cute love-song about expressing feelings to a girl you like. Musically this laid-back midtempo R&B jam is the perfect kind of song to lean back and relax to, the odd rap about ham nonwithstanding.
Composers/Producers: Woosung (original artist), JerryL (BtoB - I want to go on a Vacation, Minhyuk feat. CHEEZE - Purple Rain, UNI+ - Present)

YouTube Channel: via The Rose
Trivia: He is from Los Angeles, CA. He competed on the first season of Kpop Star. He participated in the writing and production of the song Yolo from Boys24 (link). His role model for The Rose is The Beatles, a band that showed both vocal talent as well as creativity. During the album cover shooting for his Wolf EP they used a real wolf-dog for the photos, and he says it was difficult because the wolf-dog did not listen to commands and kept wanting to wander away. He is close to BM of KARD and Ashley of Ladies Code due to their US upbringing. When he was young he watched a video of Angus Young of AC/DC and loved the look of the guitar so made one himself out of shoelaces and a toy sword he had. His mother ended up buying him a guitar after that, though it wasn't until he was injured while playing football in high school that he decided to devote his energies fully into music. ________________________________________________________
IN MEMORIAM
VERMUDA
Who were they?: A five member boy group under Pacemaker Entertainment. Their name in Hangul is spelled the same way as the island of Bermuda. Their fandom name was Triangle, the same as the title of their debut EP.
Debut: June 12th, 2017 with Dream Girl (MV) Live Stage (Link) Dance Practice (Link)

Song: Described as "Ratchet" and "Hip House" in style, the goal was to release a debut track that was different than other idol music. A fun bass beat and multiple tempo and texture changes throughout the song do keep things interesting.
Composers/Producers: E-QLO (Limesoda -Wave, Lusty - Thirsty, Girls on Top - Hola), BOK (Various - Barbie Girl, Oui Boyz - Hold Me, Luna - Cheers)

Final Release: February 13th, 2018 with Farewell (audio)

Song: A tender ballad about knowing that the heart of your significant other is turning away from you. This was released as a digital single and did not receive any promotion.
Composers/Producers: Dajay (Sixbomb - Hiccup Hiccup, Sixbomb - Getting Pretty (before), Sixbomb - Getting Pretty (after)), Nakang (group member)

Active Between: June 2017 - Sometime in 2019
Reasons for Disbanding: All of the groups social media accounts were deleted or went silent, which combined with no output since 2018 leads to the likelihood that the group has quietly disbanded. No other groups or information can be found for the group's company Pacemaker Entertainment, so it's possible the company folded as well.
Trivia: The group featured former members of 100%, ZPZG (which is rumored to be reforming), and Mr. Slam. Member NaKang who contributed to the writing of their final track is a cousin of KiKwang from Highlight. The group had previously been known as BEAM. It appears that they attempted to do live touring internationally including in China and Japan during 2018.
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That's it for today, let's get the discussion on!
As always, if you have any suggestions for groups, content, or things you'd like to see, please let me know in the comments below.
Also as always, a big shout-out to u/not-named-in-credits for founding nugutown and u/sharnaranwan for continuing the work over there.

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